Birthdays

June 2001 – Danny and I anxiously waited the time that the test required in order to give an accurate reading. We sat in the living room, lost in our own thoughts. When it was time, we quickly, yet hesitantly, went to where the test had been waiting… It was positive. We were going to be parents. At that moment my emotions took over. Yes, I was excited. But included in the array of emotions I felt were nervousness, anxiousness, fear, and worry all at the same time. I had wanted a baby, but at that moment I wasn’t so sure.

Jump ahead four months – It’s a boy! I could actually see on the ultrasound with my own eyes his little tiny fingers, itty-bitty toes, and of course the all important sign between the legs that this baby inside of me was indeed a boy. Words can’t really express the kind of connection I felt to this little one when I saw him for the first time on the TV screen in the small exam room of my doctor’s office. He was real. He was so tiny. He needed me. And yet I had no idea how much I would end up needing him.

March 25, 2002 (1:00 am) – “Danny. Danny. Wake up, Danny. I’m having contractions.” Of course Kaden would not be early or late for his arrival into our family. He would be right on time, on his due-date, not before or after. That should have told us a little about his personality. Fifteen hours and many, many, many pushes later he was here – beautiful, sweet, and amazingly even-tempered.
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My little boy turned six this week. He doesn’t really like to be called a little boy anymore. To him, of course, he is a big boy.

It seems, at least for me, as we celebrate our children’s birthdays, we get the chance to look back at the years gone by. As I have, I remember all of the poopy diapers and occasional accidents on the floor. I remember time lost as I took him to daycare as a working mom, yet time gained as I enjoyed staying home with him. I remember trips to the park, to the swimming pool, to the movies, and of course to grandma’s and grandpa’s houses. There were occasional bumps and bruises, a lot of fevers, some colds and coughs, and even a stay at the hospital when he had pneumonia.

These are all memories now. Of course there will be a lot more bumps and bruises. There will be lots more sickness. There will be plenty more trips to take. In all, there will be many more memories to make. It’s just nice to have a reminder to take the time to make those memories. Time goes way too fast to sit back and just watch.

Again, I had no idea how much I would end up needing Kaden. His patient, loving, caring, sensitive and sweet personality has been the greatest example for me. I see so much of his dad in him – that would be where the patience comes from. He constantly reminds me of the kind of person I could and should be.

What an amazing job we have as parents/mothers to teach these children when they so often end up teaching us. In fact, I think that’s why Kaden was sent to me; because he is the perfect person to make me better.